The Jazz Butcher - Bicycle Kid

Artist: The Jazz Butcher
Bicycle Kid

Album: Big Planet Scarey Planet (1989)


The Butcher says…

(about the album) This was a real "band" album by a touring unit which had become really quite ferocious. In choosing to work with John A. Rivers again we felt that we were sufficiently noisy and fierce to cope with any over- tidy production strokes he might pull. "Clean *that* up, then, ya bastard" was out declared policy in the group.

Of course, we under-rated him.I wanted to start to mess with the pretty traditional song structures we were using. We were all aware that music was changing, and, more out of interest than out of any spurious "career" concern, we wanted to see where we could take our pop songs using things like breakdowns, the mixing in of "found" voices (which we first heard NOT from Steinski or the Bryne/Brian Eno collaboration, but from John Stapleton, a DJ who scratched things in at early The Blue Aeroplanes, radical and unexpected changes of sounds - a series of sonic events rather than plain old verse/chorus structure. I probably did too much pre-production on my (new) 4-track at home, and the whole thing sounds a bit stillborn.

(about Bicycle Kid) One will appreciate that a few years have passed since this was written. He is Bicycle Bloke now. One day he will hear this tune and the Butcher will be toast: "Bicycle Kid - the jumped up B-side that ruined my life."


He's a bicycle kid, He's got his Mister T. slippers.
He's a bicycle kid, he's eleven years old.
Dog-faced spawn of a working class Tory,
Bicycle kid never does what he's told.
He's a bicycle kid and he wants to get a crossbow.
Bicycle kid had a rabbit that died:
Evil little fucker put his pet through the window,
The he ran to his mother and he cried, cried, cried.


So cry like an onion bicycle kid,
'Coz I'm gonna get your for the things that you did.
Cry like an onion bicycle kid,
You're just another sucker at heart.

Bicyle kid - extortion in the playground.
What does he do with all the money he made?
Bicyle kid in Kentucky Fried Chicken
And the WHAM-BAM-RAMBO machine arcade.
He's a bicycle kid, and his mother's on Valium.
He's a bicycle kid, and his dad's on the lump.
He's a bicycle kid, and his tea's in the micro.
He's a bicycle kid and he's on the dump.


Bicycle kid shitting in a greenhouse.
Bicycle kid down at the aquadrome.
Bicycle kid in trouble with a policeman.
Bicycle kid "he's a good boy at home".
Bicycle kid grow up and get an Escort.
Bicycle kid grow up and get worse.
Bicycle kid forget to use a condom.
Bicycle kid! It's evolution in reverse!


You're an evil mother fucker.

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